Todays lesson taught by... El Buick

Well since it was so beautiful today and I didn't want to stay inside I decided to wash my car. Here is what I learned from it, and I hope you all learn from my mistakes.
Top 10 Tips for washing a car:

1. Never wear white shorts. No matter what. If you think you're car looks clean, it's not. Even when it's clean it's dirty. White shorts is a bad idea.

2. If you do wear white shorts and happen to lean against your dirty wet car-creating a plethera of mud on yourself, quickly take them off and get the spot out.

3. When looking for the spot remover spray, always clear away other cleaners because when they get bumped they fall on your head.

4. Make sure you're outside water is turned on or you will have to carry all of the water from the bathroom to the car in ice cream buckets.

5. Never wash your car alone. You will have to run to the bathroom to get rinse water every two minutes instead of sending your little sister and by the time you get back to the car the soapy water will have evaporated therefore making it impossible to get the streaks out and you will have to start over.

6. Never park under a blossoming tree. When wet, the blossem petals stick to the car and make it like a tattoo, nearly impossible to get off, and if it does come off, there is still a trace of where it was.

7. Forget washing the windows, they just look worse if you try to clean them.

8. Don't wash the top of the car. As soon as you do birds think its hilarious to relieve themselves right as you finish.

9. Streaks never come off. No matter how hard you try. You might as well give up and save some energy from running from the bathroom to the car again and again.

10. It is usually worth it to fork out the dough and just go to an automatic car wash. Then it's not your fault if it still looks terrible, which it usually doesn't if you go there first.